Head in Sand Again!

13th April – A milestone passed! Yesterday was the very first day since the 25th January I didn’t have a dressing on my leg. My skin just doesn’t know what has hit it. All around the surgery is shiny bright and paper thin and was sick of being constantly being taped up. I had a bath, sore back again, on Monday night and yahoo the final scar fell off. While playing golf yesterday I did keep the support bandage on and was glad I did as when I took it off and just wore normal clothes for the remainder of the day there was chaffing on the graft which caused some discomfort. The main thing is that now I can at least oil and cream the area and try to get it feeling a bit normal. I basically feel like as if someone got a large piece of old dried up thick leather and stuck it to my skin which is why it is still hurting when I bend my knee. Hopefully it will loosen up in time. Oh I am just so glad I am at this stage as I was concerned about if it had to be dressed for another couple of weeks how I’d manage showers and dressings in golf clubs. It really looks very unpleasant and I will be keeping it hidden for at least a year!

Emotionally I’m in a very odd space at the moment. To be honest I feel so good that all the above seems to have been written by someone else. I guess I’m heading back into the head in the sand part of my life where I’ve been since 1989. This day week I see the GS, and I know I can’t/shouldn’t organise anything until I see him but have gone and organised a match for the 1st May which I am determined to play. Yet I know I must be realistic so have arranged a hairdressers appointment this morning. I’m timing it for when interferon starts, want to have a lovely set of highlights in newly cut hair then that I can stretch out for as far as possible.

Atmosphere in the house is weird. The Boy, studying away with my encouraging him that the end is in sight and to make one final push. He looks really tired. I know he is counting down to LC while I simultaneously am counting down to Interferon. I feel so well, I really don’t want to start putting this into my body but know I’ve no choice; I’ve been offered nothing else! People are now starting to talk about holidays too, I can’t even think that far ahead, I’ve to think of how small a freezer bag I can get to store the bloody drug in, letter from the doctor to enable me to fly with syringes and, not least, how will I feel while taking this blooming thing. My own determination has me motivated to putting up with any side effects and getting the course finished, on the other hand, I am feeling so well, am now wondering am I that strong to stick something out which is going to interfere with my life! Agh stop thinking! Off to hairdressers now!


About carnsoreboxer

Mad housewife and mother who enjoys golfing, reading and travelling
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