5th July – Well nurse finally arrived in afternoon so morning was knocked out but did get out for a walk to pass the time. She arrived full of information – not ! Apparently she should have had a pamphlet and a diary for me as well as other information but muttered something about cut backs and it being start of month everything was in short supply. I did however,manage to snag a carry bag from her which is great as it means my medication, which must be stored in the fridge, will not be on view to all and sundry including the Boy and his pals. It also means I can travel with it just will have to put a freezer pack into it. She kindly gave me a needle disposable unit, I already have one from the hospital but figure 2 would be handy for travelling etc. – I’m learning on my feet.
So very matter of factly she said lets go. She showed me how to open the syringe and the
needle parts, how to break the pieces off them, how to assemble them etc. It was funny as everything she tried to get me to do was jammed so just hope I remember how to do this on my own. She went through the leaflet that came with it, already done that and said off you go I can’t really show you as I’m left handed. Ok so I did it!
#1 3miu’s 14.30 5th July
16.30 feeling very tired but putting it down to releasing the tension of the past few days
18.30 feeling very cold, check temperature it’s 18 outside
19.30 now in bed with electric blanket on and my hands and feet icy to touch. Feeling very achy with pains in joints, try to sleep, doesn’t work hear rest of family downstairs. Take 2 paracetamol
22.00 getting too hot now throwing covers off me but can’t settle
23.00 given up trying to sleep. Downstairs in back garden cooling off with strong drink in hand. Thinking this is great I can at least have a drink but half way through I’ve had enough! Finally take myself back to bed and eventually fall asleep.
6th July – feeling shattered as if I’m getting over a dose of something. I slept quite
well in the end apart from waking every now and again just too hot. When I finally woke this morning I was drenched in sweat as if I’d broken a fever during the night. I really hope that these symptoms ease then disappear as don’t fancy these regularly. The interferon nurse did say that the harder the symptoms the better the drug is acting so I suppose it is a double edged sword. Went back in this morning to re-introduce myself to my new GP. Have to say she really is lovely. Told her about last night and she laughed said she’d have done the same i.e. drink! She was surprised at how well I’m holding it
together considering what’s been going on over the past few months but laughed and said I looked great as if I’m just back from holidays. Might sound funny, but she is spot on, I am looking well and am feeling great which is why the interferon is so bloody hard to take. I’ve arranged to get further bloods done with her, finally some small saving and she has added on sugars and cholesterol so she’ll have a total base level with my health. I told her that if I ever turned up and said I was sick she was to take me seriously as I just don’t do doctors and get fed up with people wasting their time over small issues. I prefer to try and fight something myself and am very lucky in that I am never sick. Off now to meet pal for coffee and try to get my life back into some type of normality
7th July – Well it was great to meet my pal and have a life, however, when I returned home I distinctly felt ill. This might sound off the wall but I think my interferon might just have coincided with me getting a heavy cold. I understand that I’m to expect flu like symptoms, however, I didn’t think this meant sore throat, coughing, sneezing etc. If it does it will mean boxes of tissues for the next few months.
#2 3miu’s 7th July 8.45 decided to take as early as possible as I want to be ok for golf tomorrow evening.
11.00 Although feeling very tired decided to go out for a walk. After about 100 yds., if I were on my own I would have turned back but said nothing and kept walking as OH was
with me. I really was forcing one leg in front of the other. One noticeable change is I am cold and although a nice day walked wearing a heavy jumper. Got too hot then but decided as I was close to home to keep going.
12.00 Returned home tired and feeling like lying down but decided instead to stay up and do some stuff on lap top
15.00 Head over to the shop and bump into C first. She is surprised to see me wearing a jumper and feels my hands and they are freezing. In conversation with C I said that one thing that has happened this year is that I’ve lost some of my confidence. I’m ok with people/friends who know what is going on and also happy in golf club where I’m just let do my own thing, but I have turned down a golf outing with some people from my old club. They know I’ve been ill but haven’t been in contact and I do feel when I’m out meeting people who know but haven’t bother contacting me it’s as if I’m on show and they are looking at this person with cancer again. Some people are just gawkers and it has really knocked me so I’m happy staying within my own circle. I am not a circus freak! I then continue into a shop and bump into A that I haven’t seen in a long time. The very first thing she says is “Oh My God have you had something more taken off
your face?” Yes! “Good God will the scar fade it looks terrible”!!!! I felt awful, considering what I’ve gone through over the past few months, add to that the tension of starting interferon on Tuesday and my conversation 5 mins before with C I really was upset. I didn’t let on and thought afterwards that she’s lucky I wasn’t wearing shorts and she’d
see my 2nd shark bite in my leg. Even still, a few hours later, I am totally shocked at her
reaction. Yes I have a scar, well 2 but they are more or less joined up. I was wearing sun glasses and the scars run across the bridge of my nose, God she really was looking closely, I have been massaging bio oil into it and the odd person who does make a comment makes a really positive one. This throwaway remark has knocked months of positivity out of me.
17.00 Dinner is turning into something very light as I just can’t stand the thought of eating something heavy. So a lovely salad with Ceylon chicken. Family seemed to like it but the Girl got her oar in and wondered if it was enough for the Boy. Grr even the thought of cooking something rich makes me feel ill.
18.00 Changed into tracksuit and socks as very cold. I am tired but I think I managed today well, It will be interesting to see how I am tomorrow